It’s been two years since Boeing’s infamous door plug decided to yeet itself into the skies (as if it had somewhere better to be), giving Alaska Airlines passengers a free “convertible jet” upgrade that absolutely no one asked for. Fast forward to today, and Boeing is attempting a PR stunt so audacious it’d make Will Smith blush (you remember his post-slap apology tour, right?).

With 33,000 workers fresh off a seven-week strike and 737 Max production sputtering back to life, Boeing called in the big guns… 60 Minutes (because nothing screams damage control like an investigative news segment). Let’s unpack this mess.

Last week, Boeing quietly restarted production of its best-selling 737 Max jetliner. Why so sneaky? Probably because the FAA still has its production capped at 38 planes a month after a door panel decided to audition for Fast & Furious: Sky High.

Boeing dreams of cranking out 56 planes a month, but let’s be real… that’s about as likely as Elon Musk showing up on time to anything. Analysts are predicting they’ll average just 29 planes a month by 2025. For context, before things went fully off the rails (see: two fatal crashes and regulatory nightmares), Boeing was delivering over 800 planes annually. Next year? They’re projected to deliver fewer than 400.

Let’s face it: Boeing is strapped for cash. With a debt load the size of a skyscraper building and free cash flow still in the red, every 737 Max delivered is critical. The seven-week strike by 33,000 factory workers only added to the delays. But now that production has resumed, Boeing is trying to spin this as a comeback story.

Cue the dramatic ticking clock and welcome to 60 Minutes, where whistle-blowers took the stage to roast Boeing like it was a Comedy Central special. They aired grievances about safety standards and manufacturing quality, and Boeing’s response? A carefully polished PR statement claiming they’ve “evaluated” these issues for years. In other words: “We heard you, we ignored you, and honestly, it’s probably fine. Maybe.”

Despite the bad press, Boeing’s stock saw a small uptick, gaining 2.7% recently. Why? Investors are either forward-looking or just really into self-punishment. Sure, the stock is still down over 60% from its 2019 highs, but Wall Street is holding onto the hope of a 2025 turnaround, with projected net income of $2 billion and deliveries climbing to 540 planes. Not pre-crash glory, but at least it’s better than being fully grounded.

Boeing has about 4,200 orders for the 737 Max in its backlog, but fulfilling them will depend on overcoming supply chain issues, safety concerns, and restoring trust. Some analysts are even floating the idea of breaking up the company into separate divisions to unlock shareholder value… because it’s that bad.

For now, Boeing is banking on its PR blitz to reassure investors and the flying public. But let’s be honest… for some reason the company’s cursed and I don’t know if that’s ever going to change.

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